Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Ticked Off Tuesday

Warning, rant in progress!

We are HIGHLY OFFENDED and GENERALLY OUTRAGED!! 

Some TWIT Bein goin by the name of Emily Georgie had the mousie NERVE to suggest ta US that she would pay us $25 per post if we accepted HER posts on OUR blog like they was OURS.  Promised to make them even seem like our posts (yeah, like annyone could do THAT)!
  -----------------------------------
"Hi,

My name is Emily and I am a blogger for multiple advertisers at Feed My Blog. We are looking for sites just like your website Marks Mews to publish blogs on.

We have blog projects ready and waiting which would fit perfectly on your site and we are willing to pay you a $25 contribution fee for everyone you publish to help towards the cost of running your blog.

The content is written for YOUR BLOG, not for our clients and within these blogs we'll include a few useful ‘relevant’ and natural links out along with a royalty free image fully credited… Our blog writing is pretty awesome.

Here are some examples of what we do. (These are not directly related to your blog).
[deleted linkies]

Even though we will write the blogs for your site, you can pass this content as your own, and you don't have to label it as a guest post or anything like that, we'll even pay you for every post you publish to contribute to your site.

So here’s the deal:

We will write awesome blog content for your readers
We will pay you $25 for every post you publish
The blogs will be in an online word doc easy to copy and paste into your site
We will find all the relevant images so you don’t have to
We will write maybe once or twice (maybe more) per week for you

So, amazing quality content + $25 for each post you publish = Win, Win!

Let me know if you'd like to benefit from this great content. I can probably match some great placements for you within a day or so."

 -------------------------

Well, oh yeah, Emily?  View THIS up yer $25...

Back to normal now...  An we sure TRUST none of our friends would accept such an offer.

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Plus, we had some questions about Marley hunting the dove on the lawn some days ago...

Marley:   Um yeah, the grass could be taller, but TBT doesn't let it be taller MUCH (it gets ta 4 inches an he cuts it down ta 3 inches).  We ARE however, allowed ta play with and eat annything we catch.  He studies the birdies and knows that there are more of them around than before we came, so we arent reducin them anny.  There were 2 pairs of the cardinals and now there are 9 or 10.  An he doesnt really care about the doves and sparrows an blackbirds (there are too many of those around).  While we sure cant catch them very often, we are welcome to.  TBT does NOT like sparrows and blackbirds.  Doves are sorta neutral but kinna big fer us ta catch annyway.

We are free ta catch robins.  That may seem a surprise, but they mostly eat worms an TBT likes the worms in the ground.  They do good stuff fer the soil.  But we can never get close ta them, so it probly doesnt matter.

Also, stuff like frogs, skinks and grasshoppers are fair game, though we aren't allowed ta bring them in the house.  An hackin one up in the house gets ya tossed out on the deck fer an hour even iffen ya wanna be in.  We're not real thrilled about THAT!

He does suggest we try ta leave the cardinals and goldfinches alone though.  So we do.  We can only have THEM when they commit birdicide on the deck door an he confirms they are fresh-dead.  If they are old-dead, we can play with them but then they go into the covered compost bin.

All that seems a lot complicated, but we know the rules good an we follow them. 

Catchin all mousie-like critters is ALWAYS encouraged and rewarded. 

He would LOVE it if we kilt evry mole and vole in the yard.

18 comments:

Ann Adamus said...

Normally we would say OhMyCat, however we are going to say OhMyGAWD. How could you possibly turn your tail up at that easy money?
How could you show that a-end to this cash cow?
Surely those woulda been, coulda been amazing, amusing, so-like-you, well-written, humorous posts with great photographs. Surely!
HA!

Too, too funny. The Zoolatry Human just fell off her chair reading this post (and seeing Marley's photo ...)put your link on the CB, nobody should miss this one!

OMC, OMG. Just perfect.

Fuzzy Tales said...

Marley's response was brilliant. Similar to how our human would like to respond to spammers of all sorts. ;-)

As for your rules--you have a lot of them!

We have one or two: No killing anything four-legged or feathered, not that we get much opportunity for that. Moths and damselflies, etc., are fair game, though. :-)

Andrea and the Celestial Kitties said...

Marley, rarely have we ever heard such a good arguement! MOL

Let the hunters hunt, just don't bring the kill inside!

Brian said...

Butt of course you told Emily no!

Sometimes, Cats Herd You said...

Good answer, Marley! Pointing out to the spammer that her $25 per post would certainly offset the potential $11,000 per post fine for posting her work and endorsement links without disclosure would not have been anywhere near as entertaining as showing her your posterior!

Mark's Mews (Ayla, Iza, and Marley) said...

Wow, SCHY! We are saving $11,000 per post? Does that go into our food fund? It seems ta us we could have live mousies in the bafftub at least once a day fer THAT!

Sparkle the Designer Cat said...

I wish we could go hunting like you kitties!

Terri said...

Jenna loved the tail of disrespect! That sounds like a lot of hunting rules for you kitties :(

Angel Keisha said...

Dat hoomin was bad! I glad u did not listen to her. :)

Megan said...

It might almost have been worth giving this woman a trial with one post just to see how good she is at imitating your writing style. For starters, she claims that her blog writing is "awesome" when EVERY cat in the blogosphere knows that it's "pawsome" she actually means.

As for royalty-free images: tell her that your blog posts almost always feature pics of you three, so she'll need to get her hands on some of those. TBT, of course, would be her only source. To cover the cost of TBT's time to take pics for her to use, you'll need to charge her a modest fee of, ooooh, say $50 per pic. Given that some posts might include up to six pics, you're now starting to talk serious money.

Perhaps you could also send her a list of topics that your readers expect to see on your blog. She'll want to stick pretty close to the list if she genuinely expects you guys to pass off her writing as your own. Gee - now that I think about it, ask for her phone number: I think you'll need to conduct a job interview. How much does she really know about mousie hunting, whose turn it is to lie on TBT's legs today, why Ayla likes being up high, and the nuances of who sits where on the cat trees each day? She has a lot to learn from you guys. If she still wants the job after the interview, I suggest that you propose an intensive training programme, the fees for which might be of the order of $300 per day. A four-week introductory course will bring in some serious funds for extra rations, new toys, treats and fresh nip.

Marley - I think there's a lot more to this offer than you might have considered at first. It may just be worth exploring. If Emily is interested in taking on the cat blogosphere at large, you, Iza and Ayla may find yourself fully occupied as her coach, mentor and quality assurance inspectors. And think of the tricks you could play on her!

What's more, she introduces herself but then talks about "we" - as in "we will write ...". That suggests that once you've worked intensively with her to get her up to speed, you might need to repeat the process for all her colleagues. You could become millionaires!

Think about it before you reject the idea entirely. Given how little she knows about cat blogging, you can be fairly confident that she didn't quite get your message sent in pictorial form. She probably just thought you were being shy and turned away from the camera! If you act quickly, I think you can recover the situation.

There's a lot to consider here.

Megan
Sydney, Australia

Mariodacat said...

Marley said it all!!!!! OPf all the nerve!

Derby, Ducky said...

We like Megan's ideas. Plus we thinks they would then want your bank account number to make a, ahem, deposit. Which would likely end up being a withdrawal!

Stay away, we would rather read your stuff then their stuff.

Angel Prancer Pie said...

The tail says it all, Marley! Mol!

We think you kittehz should teleport down to Oklahoma sometime. We could hunt moles to our heart's delight! We are overrun with those things!

Happy Wednesday, furriends.
XOXO

The Crew said...

Hahahaha! Great use of Spot 13, Marley!!

Jans Funny Farm said...

We don't remember who it was from but we received one of those emails a while ago and we weren't happy about it either. It shows the person has not actually READ the blog and has no clue what the blog is about! She will find what relevant photos? Like you, we use our own animals and graphics for the blog.

The Swiss Cats said...

One picture is worth thousand words.... Purrs

Flynn said...

Well done Marley! I couldn't have thought of a better reply myself.

Shaggy and Scout said...

Marley, you are one of a kind!